Moe, for better or worse

This blog used to be called "one year in the life of a short fat runner"; then it was called "Am I a runner? you decide." I've decided running isn't the thing I need to talk about'll come up for sure, but it's just one part of me, so I think I'll just call this blog: Moe, for better or worse.

Sunday, August 31, 2008

I think...

I'd like to be 10 again.

Would that work for everyone?

Because I'm sorta tired of being an adult and all that comes with it.

And it's not gonna get any easier from now on, is it?

just harder. Much much harder.

I'm just so tired.

My mom's in the hospital again. She's had a bad reaction to her latest chemo and they're trying to get fluids in her and get her stabilized. She'll be ok (as ok as she will ever be now, since she lives with cancer 24/7 for the rest of her life) and she'll go home on Monday. Later this week, she'll go see her oncologist and they'll change her chemo to something else and she'll do ok for a while or she won't, and then they'll try something else.

She's been sick for days, she's lost more weight, she's suffering humiliations and indignities and pain no one should have to face, all in the name of a "cure", which is just a cruel joke, since she'll never be cured. She'll just be kept alive until there's nothing else they can do and then, finally, the cancer will win.

It's going to win anyway.


Blogger sauconRunner said...

I'm so sorry, Maureen. Cancer is just so evil. Your mom is in my thoughts and prayers.

September 01, 2008 10:55 AM  
Blogger Theia said...

Your mom is a fighter. Even though I haven't met her, I know just from how you talk about her and the rest of your family.

All of us are fighters too. And we'll continue to pray and hope and everything else to help her... and you.

September 03, 2008 11:10 AM  

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